The average American lives 78.55 miles from their mom (2023 data)

Moms tend to play an outsized role in their children’s lives, whether that’s childcare, helping to buy a first home, or requiring care herself. A major factor that affects the role a mom can play in her children’s lives is how far they live from her.

With costs like childcare and aged care on the rise, and housing prices out of reach for many, we wanted to find out how far people live from their mom, whether they wanted to live closer, and if they could even afford to.

We surveyed 1800 people across the country to find out.

Key takeaways

• Americans live on average 78.55 miles from their mom
• 46.07% of people cannot afford to live in the same area as their mom
• 38.86% of people see their mother weekly, while 5.96% of people never see their mom
• 88.16% of people would like to see their mother more often
• 90.63% of people would try to move closer to mom if she needed care
• 42.66% of people had, or expect to have, help from mom with a home down payment

The average American lives an hour from mom

78.55 miles is the average distance people in the US live from their mom. This puts the average American between 59 and 67 minutes away mom (based on a highway speed of 70 to 80mph).

Those between 18 and 24 years of age are likeliest to live near mom, with an average distance of 59.49 miles. Those between 45 and 54 live the furthest away with an average distance from mom of 85.27 miles.

Can anyone afford to buy a home near mom in 2023?

Almost half of all people cannot afford to live in their mom’s area. 46.07% of people say they cannot afford to live in the same area as their mom.

Those aged 25 to 34 are least likely to be able to afford a house in their mom’s area, with 52.25% saying they could not afford it. At the other end of the spectrum, those aged 55+ are most likely to be able to afford a house in their mom’s area, with 66.43% stating they could. This is despite those who are 55+ living further from mom (82.82 miles) than the average (78.55 miles).

When we look at gender, men (58.01%) are more likely to afford to live in their mom’s area than women (50.54%).

Of those that can’t afford to live in their mom’s area, 73.12% would live closer if they could afford it. Men (75.60%) are more likely to say they would move closer to their mother if they could afford to than women (71.36%).

Malcolm-Wiley Floyd, CEO of Stairs Financial commented, “With affordable housing at record low levels, it’s not surprising that around 2 in 5 people can’t afford to buy in the same area as their mom. Between 1980 and 2023, the median price of a home, adjusted for inflation, rose by $261,000, meaning that on average it’s much harder to buy in the same areas as your parents once did.”

People tend to see their moms weekly

With the average American living around an hour from mom by car, how often are people actually seeing their mom? According to our data, it’s most common for people to see their mom at least on a weekly basis.

38.86% of people see their mother weekly, while 5.96% of people never see their mom.

Women see their mothers less than men, with 42.74% of women saying they see their mother once a month or less, compared to 37.37% of men.

How frequently you see your mom has a big impact on the total amount of time you get to spend together. If you see your mom daily for 2 hours for 20 years, you’ll spend 1.7 years together. If you see your mom weekly for 2 hours, you’ll spend 2.9 months together. Seeing mom monthly for 2 hours over 20 years will only give you 20 days together.

9 in 10 want to see their mom more often

The answer to this question is a resounding yes. 88.16% of people would like to see their mother more often. In terms of gender, more men (91.14%) would like to see their moms more often than women (85.65%).

Interestingly, only 41.31% of people that say they’d like to see their mom more often, also say they can’t afford to live closer to her. Conversely, 58.69% of people would like to see their mom more often and can afford to live in her area, but choose not to.

People would live closer for childcare or if mom needed care

The majority would try to move closer if it meant either help with childcare or helping care for mom.

74.97% of people say they would try to move closer to their mom if they needed childcare. Men (78.64%) are the most likely to try to turn to their mom for help with childcare, compared to women (71.91%).

What about is mom needed help? 90.63% of people say they would try to move closer to their mom if she needed care. The sentiment is shared by both men (90.91%) and women (90.4%).

Moms help 2 in 5 people buy their first home

42.66% of people say their mom helped to pay their down payment on a home or they expect that she will in the future.

“The average cost of a down payment for a first home is around $17,000 for first-time homebuyers, a substantial amount of money for any parent to give or loan to their child,” commented Malcolm-Wiley Floyd, CEO of Stairs Financial.

Those aged 55 and over are the most likely (53.15%) to say their mom helped or would help them to afford their down payment on a home with those aged 45 to 54 (39%) expecting help the least.

Men (47.19%) are more likely to say their mom helped or would expect them to help with affording a downpayment, while almost 10% less of women (38.90%) say the same.

Malcolm-Wiley Floyd, CEO of Stairs Financial, commented, “Turning to your parents is one of the most common forms of down payment assistance used, particularly for buying first homes. Parents want to help their kids build a home for their families and a strong base for their financial future. Being close to the grandkids is a nice bonus.”

Moving closer to mom is possible

Thousands of down payment assistance programs exist to help Americans purchase their first home. Finding the programs you qualify for can be hard. Stairs makes the process simpler by finding all the down payment assistance programs you qualify for and connecting you with a lender that can help. Get early access now and buy your first home (near mom) sooner.

Methodology

On the 04th of May, 2023, we surveyed 1800 people across America and asked them a range of questions related to their mom. Of the 1800 people we surveyed, 274 people’s mothers had already passed away, reducing our final sample size to 1526 people. Of those 1526 people, respondents were: all located in US; 54.59% female and 45.41% male; and were aged 18 – 24 (16.84%), 25 – 34 (26.21%), 35 – 44 (31.78%), 45 – 54 (15.79%), 55 + (9.37%).